I eventually thought to myself that if I can help him through this rough time it makes me the better person not even thinking that I may fall in love with him.(DUH!!!! That doesn't mean that he can't also love you.
) So here I am in love with a guy who hasn't even removed his wifes clothes or shoes from the closets. My advise is to stay away from anyone that just lost someone. I have not heard one happy story, Has anyone married and lived a happy life with a recent widower? We are just the buffers to help them get through it. The question is really whether you can handle your jealousy regarding his feelings for his deceased wife since you feel you are competing with her for his affections.
I want to be sure that I am getting my needs met and that I’m not just a “rebound” for him. Dear Karen, One thing I know about widowers, followed by two things I know about men.
Widowers are QUICK to rebound, to a point of being unseemly.
I just read your book “Why He Disappeared” and really appreciated the great info.
I have not “lost” the guy I’ve been dating for the past 3 months, but I need to fix some of the mistakes I was starting to make. and 1 in Oct.) when we saw each other on Saturday and Sunday (but no sleepover) we have only seen each other once a week.
He tells me he loves me, we have gone away twice, he talks about marrying me, I have met his whole family- The only people he hides me from are his in-laws. He feels obligated to take care of his in-laws, they even come before me. he has moved the pictures of her off the main floor and moved them to the bedroom. If he is open to discussing the subject, you might ask him if he would like you to help him pack those items away in boxes, not necessarily to give them away, but just to store them away, as some sign that he is willing to embark on a new chapter of his life with you.
I love him dearly and would love to spend the rest of my life with him, but not sure if I can take not being the true love in his life. His response to something like that might tell you whether he really is emotionally ready to make another lasting commitment.
I personally have never dated a man whose wife died, but I know plenty of women who have. Widowers feel guilty that they are still able to enjoy happiness, while the person they lost can’t.
At it is free to join and we aim to make it as easy and straight forward as possible for widows and widowers based in the various cities and states of the US to meet in a safe and relaxed manner, providing the ideal conditions for new relationships to blossom.
We value the life experience of each member, and suggest matches based upon location and shared interests, striving to ensure the highest possibility for genuine companionship.
With the significant growth of the internet in the past decade, online dating has become the perfect way for widows and widowers who are looking to take those first, important steps.
Sending private messages to each other in a safe and familiar environment gives you the opportunity to get to know each other gradually before you decide whether or not you want to take things further.